Now that my mother has passed, I find myself not eating sugar
(Perhaps this not eating sugar is her doing)
They say that all addiction is ego
( that lovely part of ourselves that says
It will deliver our happiness but never does)
So here I am, without my mother and without sugar,
Two forms of sweetness-gone
But both needed to go and both were ready.
I find myself without context, without habit
No shoring up, no boost of sudden energy
I’m boring and more tired
But more reliably true, becoming daily
A big barefooted Grandmother.