It was the wedding of the century
and I was there.
Terry and Michele both live at Mesa Vista
the nursing home where my sister lived.
Michele always knew where Anne was.
She is the gatekeeper at the vortex
a cosmic human,
surviving a near fatal motorcycle accident in her 30’s
Some of us get whittled
into something akin to pure light.
I have stayed in touch with Michele
and when I visited her I met Terry.
They’d met when Michele was 17
and as Terry’s said” she was with her old man
and I had a lady”
only to meet again in their 50’s,
both worse for wear,
but their wedding was the ritual’s essence.
(the groom so nervous I thought he might faint.)
Their willingness tangible
in a way that we have little access to.
As we hummed amazing grace
they walked back towards
I heard Michele say, over and over again,
I love Terry,
I love Terry,
I love Terry.
Jan would be the first to leave the wedding
Her health has been poor and it was a cold night too.
But when she stood, cane in hand
a line began to form…….
Her family seeking to say goodnight
or something, touching in for a moment
of being close to her.
Wildly radiant as she met each one
something akin to fire…..
I saw all of this!
When Henry an art student at Pratt in NY
came up, Jan extended her hand
with such a glimmer and glint in her eye
a pirate gazing into the future.
Then came the sparkling bride and her groom
hugs and kisses….
granddaughters, daughters, her son, two nieces
a brother, his wife
The night had gotten long and over
and a mist had settled on the sea.
I came last and she said
“Oh, You I’m not saying goodbye to”
And I said “Me neither”
“I’m always right by your side”
Events have conspired to offer me a paradigm shift
A long held door is open
It’s time for me to exit the Matrix.
The enculturated conditioning, so tricky to see
is now illumined by the light from an open door.
“Step through” the unknown whispers……
Joseph Campbell says this
“Our demons are our own limitations
which shut us off from the realization
of the ubiquity of the spirit.
And as these demons are conquered in a vision quest,
the consciousness of the quester is enlarged
and more of the world is encompassed.”
“My definition of a devil is a god
who has not yet been recognized.
The devil is the power in you
to which you have not yet given expression,
and you push it back.”
Time for a vision- quest!
This is my dear friend.
We are very fond of each other
and I don’t think it’s just because I feed her.
Today’s breakfast was a pesto over old beans
with carrot tops, a tasteless peach and part of an apple.
Only the finest affair for my dear friend, Pig.
Love just exists, there is no explanation for it.
But what pleasure.
“Before my body formed in the womb
the pattern of my being existed as electrical elements”
Trees too- he has seen the wonder of it.
This wisdom was delivered by my neighbor,
grinning at me from under his straw hat…..
swooping us upward, he shared that
one day he got picked up by an envoy ( ET)
and when he asked how he got there
The voice said ” You can’t get here unless you are empty”
Then he suggested that I watch
“Exit Through the Gift Shop”
and went on his way.
My life is not dull….
I’m electrical 😎
When I woke up sputtering for air….
(Apnea is so weird,)
I decided to make tea
and sip it under the stars.
Under the mid- August, Perseid meteor shower.
I noticed that our young guest’s light was on,
he was sneezing, pointing to the cat.
We made him a hot chocolate
and out we went on a midnight adventure.
Sitting on the bridge
with a clear view of the night sky.
Faces turned toward the Milky Way
Saying things like…..
“Did you see that one?
or “Oh how quick”
Together filling up on stars
filling up on wonder!
Imagine yourself standing on a beach
near the waterline
as you gaze out over the ocean.
The wet sand is so solid
that your feet leave only the faintest of imprints…
You step forward
to stand just within reach of the leading edge of the waves.
As each wave curls around your ankles
and then rushes out again
notice that it sucks the sand out from under your feet,
You are forced to take a new stance, again and again.
This is something like the relationship
between the ego
and the larger divine perspective
that both attracts and undermines.
Can we be “undermined” sufficiently to allow a true transcending?
“Oh but how we resist”
A sharing from one of my all time favorite books,
Uniting Sex, Self and Spirit by Genia Pauli Haddon
I am making an apple pie
and for my big bumbling country
made up of individuals wrestling with the same demons.
Remember how Jimmy Carter got busted for having lustful thoughts
Well, I’m busted too, my thoughts are often not great,
a form of shadow boxing that I think is real
Lustful would be way better👩🦳
We are not going to get anywhere
unless we realize that we are bonified crazy here,
that life is a wild and free- not knowable – experience
that is not identifiable by what we say it is.
One of women I knew in the mountains
named her son Freedom.
Apple pie for All!🥧
A puff of air, as we sailors call it
rippled the surface of the lake this morning.
My sister has had a touch and go year.
She’s hoping to be getting off
of a mean medicine this month
that has kept her energy low.
I painted the two of us sailing our boats, side by side
Free in the wind with her hand on the tiller.
The painting is a shamanic healing,
going into the void and choosing a high vibe,
pulling us back into what we love,
as our sails fill with a puff of air!
In the new consciousness
I may try to trick you
into believing the myth of my un-reality
for the thousandth time
But knowing you
you will see my shimmering edges….
the shared knowledge
that I’m really awesome and free.
“You are the River and I am the Shore”
Summer Solstice painting 2021
“Cause you are the river
and I am the shore.
And it goes on and on
watching the river run
further and further
from things that we’ve done,
leaving them one by one”